Adoptive family lost custody re ICWA, “has not stopped crying – (Baby) has been gone for nearly two hours now “


September 3, 2006

…..  We would love to adopt this child but find ourselves dealing with the ICWA.  Both parents rights were terminated shortly after birth, but then father’s rights were reinstated so that the child may be enrolled into the father’s tribe.  …Weekend visits have begun, and my once very happy, secure toddler has become very insecure, crying alot, and throwing tempertantrums.  My husband and I have had the opportunity to meet this cousin in her home.  All I can say is that my heart dropped into my stomach when we entere d the home.  The smell of  an illegal substance was overwhelming to my husband and I.  The state social worker however states she did not smell anything and that she needed to be carefull about how she brought our concerns to the tribal social worker as to not to step on any toes.  Her  relationship with the tribe seemed to be more important than the childs welfare.  Since then the state has made our life difficult and made us feel like we are the enemy.  This is a child who was born drug and alcohol affected and I fear that he may be put back into the same situation… Read more of their letters

UPDATE October 23, 2006

… Right now, Debra is much pain.  She has not stopped crying and (Baby) has been gone for nearly two hours now.  I am having a hard time focusing myself.  It feels like a death in our family and the weight of the pain is to heavy to bear.  I plan on taking a photograph of (baby) to our Pastor and asking him to pray…  I don’t know what else to do.  I am not a lawyer. I am a cop.  I know the law a little bit, but not it’s application.  I am aware that you do not give legal advise and I understand why.  I appreciate your support for my wife and all the help you have given her.  She is a beautiful person, both inside and out.  She really loves children and because we have not been able to have children of our own, she has chosen (or God has chosen) this path.  Finally, we don’t know how much longer we are going to be able to bear going through all of this again.  I, at this point am done.  Time will dicate our future and God will intervene, but for now, I’m done.

UPDATE November 10, 2006

…You don’t know how much your words and thoughts mean to me.  Today for some reason has been a difficult one. …………………………………………..Back to top

UPDATE April 9, 2007

…I just received a phone call from the tribal social worker asking me some questions on (baby)’s immunizations and then she informed me that he is no longer in the home of his relative placement.  Now he must adjust again to a new home after just being in the relative placement for about 6 months.  This is his 5th placement in 27 months of life.  How can they believe this is in his best inerest?  My heart is heavy and I try not to worry about him but it is diffcult.  I know that everything happens for a reason and I know through Gods grace and love I will someday understand.

UPDATE August 9, 2007

Hello Lisa,  wanted to let you know that I was unable to get the days off of work to drive with you …,  I should have acted sooner but never thought about driving to DC.  My husband and I looked into my flying but unfortunately our budget won’t allow for that.  I will be sending 50 more dollars to be put towards the trip.  Please keep me posted on what happens in DC.  I will continue to pray!  Is there anything else that we could do?

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